Month: August 2026

I started working on a new project today. It’s the first time in a while I’ve felt creatively excited. I forgot how inviting a blank project is. And also how daunting: it took only a handful of minutes setting up some basic structures for me to understand just how poorly I’d actually planned everything out, and how meticulous and exacting the design of such things would need to be in reality. I deleted all of it in a paroxysm of humility. It made me realise how long it’s been since I’ve invested so much genuine thought and effort into something. Tomorrow I will start anew.

Every day I try to write a few words, but most days I fail at even that. I don’t really have any excuses, I just lack the discipline to settle on anything for longer than a few dim hours between the sun’s fall and rise. I’m writing this tonight because I haven’t written a word in days, and some part of me hopes that it will somehow take the edge off of the sense of accumulating guilt for failing even the most basic of promises to myself; knowing, of course, it won’t do shit.