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I was seized this afternoon while sitting at my cubicle counting out the parentheses in a preposterously long Excel formula with the sudden desire to revisit a plot for Plan. I rather hastily sketched an outline for a revision and found myself contemplating for the hundredth time this year whether this year would finally be the year I committed to learning Unreal Engine. This feeling dissipated some hours later as I sat in front of the IDE repeatedly trying to click on a dropdown element that refused to stay open longer than a split second, rendering my newfound optimism rather dull. Nonetheless, it got me writing again, and I opened Gamemaker for the first time since apparently September.

I want to get back to making games again. I don’t know how I’m going to make it work logistically — the commute on this new job is a terrible time thief just on its own — but the more I think about it, the more strongly I feel that this is the right thing for me and this is the right time to feel it out again. No distractions in my life anymore, for better or worse. With everything that’s happened this year, maybe that’s not the worst thing.